One of the things I love about traveling abroad is the
strange use of the English language. Of course there is the fact that besides
English, I speak only a little Spanish and because of that I sometimes feel
like an idiot – or at least ignorant. That being said, I took some pictures of
strange signs. I had to wait until I returned from China before I could get to
some of the pictures because my phone is lame and cannot send or transfer
pictures when in foreign countries.
I visited a supermarket in China while I was here. I think
it was pretty cool since it is obviously not a place the tourists frequent.
This store has some of everything, clothing, house wares, electronics and food.
The food section was very interesting. There are the traditional canned and
boxed foods as found in supermarkets in the USA. There are aquariums with the
freshest selection of foods. This is not altogether unknown to me.
There are a lot of restaurants in Asia that have aquariums
when you walk in and actually pick out the fish you want to eat. Then it is
prepared for you while you are waiting. Here is a picture of the Chief’s ass
when we were visiting a seafood restaurant on the beach in Malaysia, note the
aquariums beside her.
This supermarket had the traditional fish fare as seen in
this first picture. The main difference is people take the live food home and prepare it. Talk about fresh. It also give you a better appreciation for where our food comes from.
In addition to the normal fish, they also have some things
that I consider non-standard such as turtles and some squid packed on ice.
But what else is that in the picture? Frogs? Yes, frogs.
I have had frog legs before but I don’t think they have ever
been this fresh… even when my brother and I were snaring them with fishing
poles at pond next to our home growing up. Eventually we caught enough to make
it worthwhile to clean and eat them.
While walking though the supermarket one other sign peaked
my interest. I think it is instructions on how to wear a bra but I’m not sure.
It also seems like this would be better placed in a dressing room (I did not
see any of these or dressing rooms).
OK. So let us see if I understand how to put a bra on. I
don’t have any experience with that, my limited
bra experience is in taking them off and tossing them to the floor or using them as a hat after the
Chief has finished the laundry… So now we can go through the steps as I see
them:
1. After putting on the bra it looks like you need to punch yourself just north of your kidneys using both hands in a kind of "thumbs up" fist.
2. Then you need to punch yourself above the right breast using your left hand. Use your right hand to make sure you don’t punch too high.
3. Scratch your lower back using both hands in a twisting motion.
4. Cut off your right hand wrist and fondle your left breast using your left hand while holding the top of the left breast with your bloody stump.
I kind of feel sorry for the right breast… it gets left out
of the fun.
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